I built my entire identity around achieving, performing, and being the one everyone could rely on — and New York City was the perfect place to keep that going. For over a decade, I chased the next rung on the ladder, drank the Kool-Aid, and ignored every signal my body sent me to slow down. It took losing my job, a pandemic, grief, and a diagnosis of chronic illness before I finally stopped long enough to ask: who am I without all of this? This is that story.

How to make yourself a cup of ceremonial cacao